Day 21: Product Testing & Sad Thoughts

I tried out my new goodies today on a morning walk! I am so thrilled too because hubby went with me. He has been sore & tired since our hike Wednesday and hadn't exercised again. He was finally ready. We went for a 3 mile walk this morning and I tried out my new hydration pack and heart rate monitor.

The hydration pack is SO comfortable. Even all full of water it is not a hindrance whatsoever. It was convenient and awesome!!! As far as comfort against the skin, I can't speak for that yet because it was chilly and I was wearing my jacket. I did notice I was the ONLY person wearing any sort of hydration pack. Everyone out walking/running/biking either had a water bottle in their hand or nothing at all. I still have a hard time with anything that people might think is "weird" because I don't like to draw attention to myself lol. But I am trying not to care because I loved it so much!!

 

See how small it is? Very light and comfortable.

Do I look like a weirdo out walking? I hope not lol. But I loved wearing this today and having hands-free hydration!

When I got home I checked out my heart rate monitor's results:

So. My FitBit calculated the walk at 353 calories (but it only counts my # of steps). My iPhone app, which doesnt use my steps but rather my distance and elevation, calculates higher at 390. My heart rate monitor calculated 446... and I really think this would be the most accurate because it's calculating it on how hard **I** am working... not some fake "me" that is figured out from statistics.

I love all my devices for different reasons. But I think having this heart rate monitor is KEY!

Also I thought the chest strap was super comfortable. I did wet it as instructed and since it basically hits where the sports bra band hits, you don't even feel it after a couple of minutes. I could easily see forgetting it was there after a workout and accidentally wearing it all day LOL.  I still haven't delved into setting up my "target zones" or anything just yet.

By this time I was negative 250 calories for the day and I wanted pizza so we grabbed a slice at Marco's. Remember last time I got a much smaller piece? And I wasn't sure if his was bigger than normal or mine was smaller than normal. Well now I know! Mine was smaller. Today they were both huge. I wasn't able to eat the crust of mine because I got full. But it sure was a delicious piece of pizza.

We also ended up going to see a movie - The Hunger Games. I haven't read the books so I am not even clear on if the movie is of just the first book, or all 3. At any rate we liked it and thought it was really interesting. 

Normally going to a theater movie is major snacking time for me but we had just eaten that pizza so I just bought water to have later on in the movie. Ian bought a box of Dots and I had one serving (11 dots) and half the big bottle of water and that's it. And I really didn't feel like I was missing anything.

By the time we got out of the movie, though, it was after 5pm and I hadn't eaten much. I had 1,300 calories or so left to eat!!!

We ended up going to Tokyo Joes which I thought would be sort of a "splurge" since I had so many calories left.

I had a regular size bowl with white chicken, teriyaki sauce, brown rice, carrots, edamame and water chestnuts. I had calculated it online as somewhere around 600 calories before we went.... and even after ALL this time it never even occurred to me that OH YEAH I WON'T EAT ALL THAT..... lol! So I ate all of the chicken but only about 1/3 of everything else in the bowl. Except I calculated full amount of sauce because I thought it was skimpy and I asked for more sauce, so not sure about that one. Anyway.... only 350ish calories in the end. LOL I left there saying to him... well there went that plan.... I still have 1,000 calories left to eat!

In retrospect NOT the best idea considering it was VERY VERY HIGH SODIUM and tomorrow is WEIGH IN! Silly me. But that's alright... it's just a number and it will change.

I ended up having a protein shake a little later because I was running low on protein for the day. My final meal was a bowl of cereal. I am still 380 calories under my goal for the day, but that's the best I can do today. No more food. I'm trying to get down one more glass of water before bed (had about 12 cups so far today) to try and counteract some of the sodium.

All in all it's been a pretty good day.... except my poor husband is really sad tonight :( His mom was texting him how she has been crying more lately and feels Ian's dad isn't going to be here much longer. We all know this but just bringing it up and keeping it in his mind really had him down tonight. Just out of nowhere he said "I just hate this feeling every day, just waiting for my dad to die". I had no idea he was thinking about it tonight. We talked for a while and he ended up just wanting to go to bed early at 9:00 (this is 2-3 hours early for him). I worry about him and being depressed... but very glad at least that he went on that walk with me today.

I can't understand how he's feeling, even though i lost my mom so recently (can't believe we are coming up to 7 months now).... because I had no warning. Of course that has it's own shock and tragedy, but waiting for it like he is must be just absolutely terrible as well. That's what my cousins went through with my uncle for over a year. My husband, his sister and their mom are all just waiting. It's hard now and will be extremely hard when it actually does happen.... and I know it will be hard for a long time. Here I am at almost 7 months since I lost Mom and I cry almost every day. I think about so many little things. Today when we went to the movies a mom and daughter crossed the street heading to the theater and I recalled how she and I used to do that together ALL the time when I was that age and she was still in good enough health to do those things with me. I wish her surgery had worked and she had gotten better so we could do things together again.

Sorry to be a downer just feeling so sad tonight... for my own loss, the things I'll never have with my Mom... and for watching my husband go through all this... and what I have yet to watch him go through. THAT part I know how it feels and I hate that he will have to feel it too. I'm 28, he's 34 and we are both already losing a parent.... and we are not yet parents ourselves. Sometimes it's just too much.

He starts his new job next week and I'm really hoping it will help him to have something to focus on. But when he does, I will be spending Tuesdays with his dad in his place, and I am so nervous as I know it will make me even more sad, but I know it will be a blessing to spend some time with him.